


Him, you, and the world

by johnmykawaiiwaifu



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, SBURB
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-29
Updated: 2012-03-29
Packaged: 2017-11-02 17:33:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/371561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/johnmykawaiiwaifu/pseuds/johnmykawaiiwaifu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your entire life has been spent secretly loving Jane's dad. And when you finally find him again, he slips through your fingers all too quickly.</p><p>The whole world is against you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Him, you, and the world

**Author's Note:**

  * For [deliberateObliviscence](https://archiveofourown.org/users/deliberateObliviscence/gifts).



> I know I should be writing Status Quo right now, but after about 16 pages worth of Dave John you kind of go insane. Anyways, wanted to write this for a long time, ended up writing it in about 10 minutes, ta da. 
> 
> Read the words. Love the words. Become one with the words. 
> 
> I command it.

It’s been so long. So long since everything, really. So long since your childhood with Jane and Dirk and Jake. So long since Frigglish had come and gone and then come and gone one more time. Except the second time he was Jasper, and you lived with a horrible sense of guilt that weighed a hundred tonnes until he came back. Except he never really came back, because he just kind of washed up. Dead. You felt even worse during the funeral, with Rose giving you disgusted looks the whole time.

And then you took to drinking again. The whole time all you could think about was how much Rose hated you, how much you were disappointing her. You tried to make it up to her. You honestly did. You showed her wizards, because you knew your mum had loved them. Maybe you showed her too much, but you tried. You tried because you loved her, and it just hurt even more when you were sober to know that she didn’t love you back.

And then Rose got into the whole ‘SBURB’ thing, and you felt a sick sense of déjà vu, and an even heavier sense of dread. There were no parents in SBURB. You were going to have to let Rose do this on her own. And you helped her, opening the way to the lab, unknowingly raising her so one day she, too, could play SBURB.

And then it was just your baby against the world, and you had to sit by and watch. And wait. And think. But the time for thinking is over. You’re here now. Where you were always meant to be. On top of a castle, with the one you could never have. He poured you a drink as you remembered.

When you were a teen, when you were just Roxy, there was only one person you wanted and that one person was the only one you couldn’t have. Jane’s dad. You thought maybe it was your drunken state, but you thought about him just as much when you were sober. How you should have tried to find him, tried to at least see him in real life once. Tell him you greatly admire him, and wish him the best on his way. Whatever way that may be. And then you would hug him, breath in the smell of dad like cologne and shaving cream and freshly laundered ties, and then be dragged away by Jane who’d be apologizing for the state of you.

But you’d always imagined yourself to be perfectly sober when it happened.

Perfectly sober like you were now. Sitting with him, _him_. It was as good as the exact same man. In fact, you think its Jane’s son, in some strange twisted way. But it didn’t matter. You were finally here. It took you years to gather the courage. Decades, in fact, but you were finally here with the one you’d thought you’d never have.

And everything was perfect.

At least, until the shaking started.

But nothing could ruin the new found love. Not a stain on a jacket, or a spilt drink. Not even the dark figure descending towards both of you. All you did was pull him up from the table, grasp his hand tightly in yours and stare bravely at Jack.

It took only a few seconds for both of you to fall, and the last thing you thought as you fell to the ground, sickened by a pool of your own blood and his, was that at least you got to see him once. And then your hands found each others again on the ground. And now it was just you and him and the world

But you watched him draw his last breath, look into your eyes before closing them one last time, and then you too closed yours.

It was just Jack and him and you and the world. And then it was just Jack, you and the world.

And then soon Jack flew away as you waited for the pain to stop. Just you and the world. Just you, and the world, and your dreams.

And then your heart beat one last time. And then the only one caring was the sky.  


End file.
